70 Funny Nurse Jokes
Here are 70 Funny Nurse Jokes and the Best Nurse Puns for Kids and Adults.
Here is our top list of Nurse Dad Jokes. Find your favorite puns about Nurses and then share them with your friends and family to make fun.
Nurse Puns
Here are 70 collections of Funny Nurse Jokes.
1. Why did the nurse always carry a red pen? In case they needed to draw blood!
2. Did you hear about the nurse who died in the ER? She couldn’t find the vein.
3. Why do nurses make terrible blackjack dealers? They always hit on 17.
4. What did the nurse say to the patient who tried to steal their stethoscope? “You’re not listening!”
5. Why did the nurse bring a red marker to work? In case they needed to draw some blood.
6. Why did the nurse keep the bedpan in the freezer? To give their patients a chilling experience.
7. Why did the nurse go to art school? To learn how to draw blood!
8. Why did the nurse bring a ladder to work? To take care of high blood pressure.
9. What’s a nurse’s favorite type of music? Heavy “meddle”!
10. How do nurses stay calm? They have lots of patients.
11. Why did the nurse bring a broom to work? To sweep away the pain.
12. Why did the nurse always carry a red crayon? In case they needed to draw blood.
13. Why don’t nurses trust stairs? Because they’re always up to something.
14. Why did the nurse go to the bank? To check their blood pressure!
15. What do you call a nurse with a bad back? A chiropractor.
16. Why did the nurse bring a glass of water to the patient? To help them find the bedside manner.
17. Why don’t nurses ever play hide and seek? Because good players are hard to find!
18. Why did the nurse become a gardener? They had a natural bedside manner.
19. Why did the nurse bring a pen to the hospital? To draw blood, of course!
20. What do you call a nurse who can predict the future? Clairvoyant-ologist.
21. Why did the nurse always carry a watch? To give their patients a timely dose of medicine.
22. Why did the nurse become an actor? They wanted to play a part in people’s recovery!
23. Why did the nurse bring a suitcase to work? In case they had to make a quick getaway from bad jokes.
24. Why did the nurse bring a mirror to the hospital? To help the patients reflect on their health.
25. Why did the nurse keep a thermometer in their pocket? To give their patients the warmest care.
26. What’s a nurse’s favorite instrument? The “patient” piano.
27. Why did the nurse wear a red nose to work? To cheer up their patients.
28. Why did the nurse become a gardener? They had a natural ability to make things grow.
29. Why did the nurse always carry a marker? To draw blood, of course!
30. What’s a nurse’s favorite game? Operation!
31. Why did the nurse bring a ladder to the hospital? To measure their patients’ height of course!
32. Why did the nurse become an astronaut? They wanted to give space-age care.
33. What do you call a nurse with a great bedside manner? A nap-can.
34. Why did the nurse bring a map to work? In case they had to chart a course for recovery.
35. Why did the nurse become a teacher? They wanted to educate patients about health!
36. Why did the nurse always carry a notebook? To take notes on their patients’ well-being.
37. What’s a nurse’s favorite food? Chicken noodle soup – it’s great for the “soul”!
38. Why did the nurse bring a deck of cards to work? In case they needed a “heart” transplant!
39. Why did the nurse become a gardener? They had a knack for “rooting” for their patients.
40. What do you call a nurse who can juggle? A multitask-er.
41. Why did the nurse bring a pillow to the hospital? To provide “rest” for their patients.
42. Why did the nurse become a detective? They had a knack for solving medical mysteries.
43. Why did the nurse become a musician? They had a great “pulse” for rhythm.
44. Why did the nurse bring a ladder to the hospital? To reach new “heights” in patient care.
45. What do you call a nurse who can’t stop rhyming? A verse-a-nurse.
46. Why did the nurse bring a broom to the hospital? To “sweep” away the pain.
47. Why did the nurse become a weather forecaster? They could predict “fever” conditions.
48. What’s a nurse’s favorite fairy tale? “Rapunzel” – because they love untangling things!
49. Why did the nurse bring a magnifying glass to work? To have a closer “look” at the patients.
50. Why did the nurse become a painter? They had a knack for “brushing” upon health.
51. What do you call a nurse with a great sense of humor? A “laugh” chiropractor.
52. Why did the nurse bring a bicycle to the hospital? To show patients the “wheel” path to recovery.
53. Why did the nurse become a chef? They wanted to “stir up” some healthy recipes.
54. What’s a nurse’s favorite dance? The “swing” shift!
55. Why did the nurse bring a dictionary to work? To “define” their patients’ needs.
56. Why did the nurse become a gardener? They loved “planting” the seeds of good health.
57. What’s a nurse’s favorite exercise? The “bedside” stretch.
58. Why did the nurse become a tailor? They wanted to “stitch up” patients’ wounds.
59. What do you call a nurse who tells jokes? A “comedy” nurse.
60. Why did the nurse bring a hammer to the hospital? To “nail down” the best care.
Best Nurse jokes
Here are the Best Nurse jokes.
61. Why did the nurse become a judge? They had a great sense of “health” law.
62. What’s a nurse’s favorite dessert? “Gel-ology” – because they love gels and jellies!
63. Why did the nurse bring a GPS to work? To always find the “way” to wellness.
64. Why did the nurse become a photographer? They could capture the “shot” at healing.
65. What’s a nurse’s favorite game show? “Wheel of Health”!
66. Why did the nurse bring a fishing rod to work? To “reel” in the best patient care.
67. Why did the nurse become a mathematician? They loved “counting” on their patients.
68. What’s a nurse’s favorite type of humor? “IV” comedy – because it’s intravenously funny!
69. Why did the nurse become a gardener? They had a great “green thumb” for health.
70. Why did the nurse bring a light bulb to work? To brighten up the patients’ day!
Final Thoughts about Nurse Jokes
Remember, humor is subjective, so different people may find jokes funny. But I hope these Nurse jokes brought a smile to your face! You can find them from YOJOKE to hear more about Occupation Jokes.
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